Tuesday, 21 October 2008

Barcelona Jacket - my way

I started the Barcelona Jacket from NaturallyCaron.com (click on title of the blog to see the free pattern) and when I finished the body it would have fitted a very short elephant. I had dropped a hook size and my tension was spot on but the garment would have measured about 49" bust when it got the bands on plus it was barely long enough to skim the bust as you can see from the first photo. The sleeve instructions defy me (and a few people on Ravelry who also had a problem with it's size) so I will be making mine cuff up and not side to side.

I thought that the stitch was very pretty so I have restarted it without the pattern (2nd photo) and am doing it on the wing. It will resemble the photo of the pattern once it is finished but my version will be longer and more fitted, less floppy and with different sleeves. Why am I humming "I did it my way"?

I finished the Mei Mei from Doris Chan's Everyday Crochet hook. It still needs all the ends sewn in. That was the drawback to using unravelled wool. I had to tie knots in the centres of rows as I was racing to finish before the wool ran out. I have managed it with very little to spare. Hopefully it will flatten down more once it is washed or blocked out. I put 2 buttons on a tab so that they bolero can be worn buttoned as in the pattern or without them altogether.

I am hoping to get to crochet the shawl together later today. I have to pick up a prescription this afternoon and so I hope that the rain will stay off long enough for me to walk up the village in the rain. Today is alternating between sunshine and showers.

I have almost read my book "No Man's Land" and it made me very sad. I could identify with Paula when she had to live her life as a lie for most of her marriage. For entirely different reasons I stayed in mine. Mine was not living in the wrong sex.

I tried to be a Stepford Wife pretending to be happy cooking and cleaning playing the role of what I thought a good wife should be like whilst my insides were screaming to get out of the situation. I feel so lucky now to be able to do what I want, buy what I want without asking permission and having to justify everything that I needed. The constant domination and disapproval of everything I did has gone. My son does not understand the personal sacrifices I made for years to keep him financially secure.I suppose only a person who has been in my situation can understand. Now I am free to be as untidy and creative as I wish without fear. No-one but me to please. If I leave my wool and patterns lying about then it's OK. If I left my knitting unattended when I was married it would be tidied away and sometimes even thrown out if he was in that kind of mood. I have lost count of the number of patterns he binned because I committed the crime of leaving them around and on view. Anything he considered to be of no consequence to him he would get rid of. Even now if he visits he tries to dis me by telling me how cluttered the house is etc. I live in organised chaos and I love it. My house is reasonably clean but cluttered, busy and in my mind very lived in. Not for me the neat, place for everything show house. I love my clutter - it's part of me.


Kathy said...

I can so empathize with your story but in an opposite way. I need order in my home and my husband is a pack rat.

But of course for you and me it never has been about who we are but who wants to control us.

And therein lies the problem.

ree said...

I love my clutter too. When your stuff is all around, you get more inspiration. That's my excuse anyhow.